Today, a brisk and drizzly Wednesday, marks the brink of Thanksgiving break for many students, faculty members, and all community members alike. There's an accumulation of vibrant red and orange leaves along the edges of pathways and a distinct smell to the air that provides a foreshadow of winter. Many lecture halls are calm, speckled with the few students who have yet to begin their break. On a few select academic building windows and bulletin boards, are festive signs wishing all a Happy Thanksgiving. Amidst general conversation amongst classmates is mention of the well-publicized Black Friday and familiar plans--most commonly involving food, food, and more food. To the economy, Thanksgiving marks the stretch of time where profit margins begin to spike into the gains. To most others, Thanksgiving marks the tradition of spending time with family, jubilant chatter over a palatable meal, and that warm, fuzzy feeling that comes just around this time.
But as we all know, things change. As we age and mature, we learn that there is no standard structure to family. The dynamic of family changes. The roles of primary care taker morphs and may even transition from one person to another within one's lifetime. As the events of life play out, even well-loved or well-dreaded traditions may have their skipped pit-stops on the journey, and eventually, may even cease to be an observed and celebrated landmark. People need to work, plans fall apart, family members may not be so harmonious when in the same room. Life happens. And we do the best that we can given the circumstances on our plate.
At times, we may find ourselves reminiscing about the younger years, what we "used to do." We'll make a few comments about how it was so much easier back then when there were no worries--no bills, no stress, no complicated variables. And we may even let out some steam amongst friends over coffee or a competitive bout of Halo. It's seldom, however, that we tell ourselves, "Life is good." It's seldom that we think about all the variables around us, that keep us going.
My definition of "family" has endured many revisions over the past several years. I equate family to groups of friends or even those that I meet, who I feel I can connect to. These are people who, even if we ever moved to the opposite poles of the planet, can come back together after a stretch of time, and pick up where we left off. For those who prefer literal definitions, these are the specific cohorts in your life that make each day interesting. They are the people who see the best, the worst, and all the sides of you in between. They are the ones who inspire you, who encourage you, and make you stop once-in-a-while in order to catch your breath. They are the ones who make true the phrase, "Home is where the heart is."
As a college student, I, like many others, will face days where we begrudgingly trek to class, running on a maximum of four hours of sleep--the result of a mixture of procrastination and well-intent of being studious. We'll have points where we pull out our hairs over course material, frustrate ourselves over a lengthy paper that seems impossible to write, and crash on the couch wondering why we even put ourselves through this torture each and every semester. And we sometimes forget the times when we experience the thrill of solving that math problem or having a concept suddenly click. We sometimes overlook the progress we make as students--from where we were, to where we are.
As I sit typing these words on a Wednesday afternoon, my classes done for the day, and my Thanksgiving break about to begin, I think about the causes for my frustration this semester, and I think about all the elements in my life that make it possible to wake up each morning and keep going. I think about the quirkiest, most caring people in my life, and how fortunate I am to be sitting here, right now, a student of this university, expressing my thoughts to you. For all this, and all that I acknowledge in my heart, I am grateful. And for what it's worth--despite what message society may place upon the holiday season, the material appeal or the cookie-cutter traditions, I believe the underlying message is everything and nothing at the same time. The holidays? They're a neon sign; a physical flag to get you to slow down, even if for just a little bit, in this fast-paced lifestyle. To not only rest, but to spend time--time amongst people or by ourselves. Time to realize that it's not so bad as it seems. Time to appreciate all the variables in our lives that we never calculated would end up in the equation. Variables that add up beautifully.
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